30 September 2016

News of another little man

The arrival of 2014 brought with it the news that we were being blessed with another beautiful boy. We could never have known how this beautiful soul would forever change our lives and complete our family...

Love this crazy child of mine

Special children

Learning to ride his big-boy bike on a camping trip

Dump trucks and beach sand

Boat ride with grandpa

Special memories

First big walk

Holiday fun with my buddy

Swimming, jumping, running, playing

First school Christmas play. That face is too much for me!

...We have another babe on the way!

Birthday ring at school

It's going to be a blue one!


Very special family holiday in the mountains

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Turning 4 - pirate party!


My heart

28 September 2016

The year he turned 3...

Here is a glimpse of what our 2013 looked like with our beautiful son:

The newest, cheekiest addition to our family. Meet Bentley.

Best friends from Day 1.

Those curls...

Precious boy

Giving some love to my first baby, Kiara

Family holiday up North - getting up close and personal with a cheetah

This child is so loved

With his nanny Maureen

Family holiday to the Drakensberg mountains.Cold!


Going for a hike with my big sister

December camping trip

What camping is all about...riding bikes with gumboots after bath time!

Turning 3. Garbage truck themed party. Yes, he was obsessed with rubbish trucks!

Mom's attempt at a rubbish truck cake :)

Happy 3rd birthday my little man!

Looking back...

So, in order to move forward with this blog, I think it's important that I take a little time to look back over the last couple of years. So I've put together a small collection of the literally thousands of photographs I have of my big boy...just to get us up to date again...

So I'll start with a look at the rest of 2012:

Our family holiday to Cape Town

Totally blown away at the bird park

Our little beach boy

Turning 2! Farm animal themed party

Our beautiful family

Birthday cake rocks!

Little brother and his big sisters

Family Christmas's are so important to our family...grandpa with his two grandbabies. How you would've loved them mom...

Time to come back

Despite my best attempts, I was always awful at keeping a diary when I was growing up. I would try so hard and write something every night - for about a week. And then I would dissappear again for a month or two until the urge hit me again.

Well, it seems I have the same level of consistency when it comes to keeping a blog up to date. So, um, this time it's about three YEARS later, but hey ho, moving on!

The main reason I started this blog was to document my son's life so as not to forget all the mundane, everyday things that I know I will miss so much when he is grown up. I now have two sons (alot has happened since I last wrote) and I am getting those same terrified twinges. He's already 18 months old and chaging every day. Already I'm starting to forget what his teeny tiny newborn body felt like in my arms. It goes too quickly.

I hope I can be more vigilant this time around and have promised myself that I will try my best to write as often as possible. I don't want to forget all these precious childhood moments - it's so fleeting. We are given our children for such a short period of time and before we know it they are off into the world and living their own lives.

So I will start with a bit of a photo recap of the past couple of years and then hopefully catch up on what's happened since the arrival of little man #2... 

27 February 2012

Date night with my little boy

On Saturday night we had a most epic fail on the babysitting front.

About two months ago I managed to arrange four media tickets to an awesome one-night-only concert in Durban - The 80's Rewind concert. But this was not just a 'tribute' concert to all the great bands of the eighties...No, this was the ACTUAL eighties bands themselves - live! I'm talking the likes of Rick Astley, The Village People and Spandau Ballet (to name a few)...In. The. Flesh.

One of my bestest friends is also the biggest 80's music freak I have ever met, so there was no question as to who I was taking with me! We decided to take our husbands along too. Because sometimes we're nice like that :)

The weekend rolled around and it started with a bang on Friday night! We had a suprise 40th for another
friend of ours' husband. We all got involved in the planning and esecuting of the Surprise Superhero Party - he's a leap year baby so it was actually only his 10th birthday! Everyone dressed the part (I was Indiana Jane and my DH was Superman. Obviously.)

Our little man's biggest big sister, M, who I think may love him alllllmost as much as me, was the designated baby sitter for Friday night. It was a big night for me because I decided to put my big-girl panties on and even let her bath him and put him down (usually I would've done it all for her and just let her sit with him after he was asleep). I said goodbye and downed a drink as soon as I arrived at the party. And then I gave myself a good pat on the back when I hadn't phoned her by 7.30pm to check that he was asleep! Look at me, clever mommy, letting go...Well, sort of!

The evening was a great success and although we got home quite late, we didn't go too crazy. We were saving ourselves for our big 80's party the following night! Saturday morning I had to attend a ladies talk and by the time I got home from that it was nearly my little man's nap time again. Our nanny, Nanny M, was our boy's designated babysitter for Saturday night and was due to arrive at 3pm. The concert started at 4pm.

At 3.30pm I was all dressed and ready to go. I had my denim shorts, luminous earrings and arm bands, side pony tail and bright green nail polish on - I looked like something out of a Madonna music video!

And then I phoned Nanny M to find out if she was running late. It turned out that she was still at home, waiting for her own babysitter to arrive! She couldn't get hold of them and it didn't look good!!! At first I was angry. How could she let me down like this? I had given her 6 weeks notice about tonight! But then I realised that she had been let down by someone else - and it was out of her hands. She's a mom just like me and she had no one to look after her babies. How could she look after mine?

I made a decision then and there that I would stay home and let my DH go with our friends. He offered and tried to insist that I go, but I was suddenly overwhelmed by a need to stay at home with my baby. I can't explain it. I guess because I hadn't been around to put him down the night before and had been out that morning I was just missing him...I'm not sure...but I decided to stay. And I'm so glad I did.

The team left for the concert and I took off my earrings, wiped of my nail polish and packed a bag for the beach. The minute my little man woke up we grabbed a snack and headed down to the water. We had such a wonderful time. We played in the sand, I caught a fish for him in his bucket (yay me!) and we swam together in the beautiful, luke warm water. Going to the beach isn't something new for the two of us - in fact we do it together almost every afternoon when I get home from work. But on Saturday I really took the time to get down to his level - and it was so much fun! We spent ages on the beach and when I started getting him ready to go home for dinner and he started to cry I realised I didn't want to go home either...we were having too much fun!

Moms best beach day ever!
After dinner I ran a big bubble bath and climbed in with him. Again I took the time to really get onto his level and we played in the bath together for ages. After he was dressed, we read stories and cuddled on the bed. I delayed putting him down. I couldn't get enough of him.

My little squishy bum...
Eventually I tucked my little sausage in and sat down on the couch. I was sad that I was now home on the couch with nothing much to do while my hubby and friends were singing "YMCA" and "In The Navy". But I was also completely content.

My night alone with my little man was an absolute dream and no amount of shouder-pad wearing, shuffle socks-dancing, 80's fun could compete with the amazing date night I had with my little boy. 

10 February 2012

I'm sorry

I'm sorry I couldn't take you to the beach one last time.

What I would give to sit beside you on a bench and watch the waves crash.

I'm sorry I chose to live so far away from you, because it meant missing out on every day stuff like being able to pop around for a cup of coffee or doing our grocery shopping together...

What I would give to do those boring, every day things with you now.

I'm sorry I didn't start trying to have a baby sooner, so you could have met at least one of your grandchildren...

What I would give to see you holding him ~ playing with him ~ looking at him...

I'm sorry I couldn't get you into a warm bubble bath one more time like you so badly wanted.

What I would give to sit beside the bath and chat to you like we used to...

I'm sorry I wasn't there to stop that nurse from hurting you.

What I would give to be able to erase that day from your life completely.

I'm sorry I couldn't take away all the pills, pipes and needles that you hated so much...

What I would give to have had you pain-free and at your happiest in those last few days.

I'm sorry I couldn't save you.

What I would give just to hear your voice and feel your arms around me today.

What I would give...

06 February 2012

Turning 30 . . . one!

Last year on my 30th birthday I woke up at 3am to breastfeed my six-week-old baby boy. My DH woke up with me and gave me my birthday present - a beautiful D&G watch. So, there I was at 3am with groggy eyes on the morning of my 30th, breastfeeding and wearing a very sexy new designer watch. I was happy. But I was also sad.

Right in the midst of being a brand new mommy I was on the feed/nappy/sleep/feed hamster wheel and I was missing my own mommy more than I had ever thought possible. So much so, that when all my friends tried to arrange a get-together for my birthday I humbly declined. I was puffy, sleep-deprived, in mourning and in no mood to party.

So, with the help of some very good friends, I ate instead. For breakfast the first of my friends arrived with two gigantic slices of my very favourite Nougat Cheesecake. It was yum. Later that day another friend arrived with a bag of delish sushi for lunch. That night my DH and two of my other favourite friends cooked me prawns and ribs (my fave combo in the world) and we had a quiet dinner together. I didn't leave the house on the day of my 30th birthday.

This year...was a little different. This year I woke up at 6.30am on the morning of my 31st birthday (because my DH got up with our now 13-month-old boy at 5.30am and let me sleep in). Even though it was only two days ago, I don't remember what I had for breakfast because, unlike last year, food wasn't my only 'comfort' and focus. From my DH and my Bug I got fabulous hair and pedicure vouchers, chocolates, undies and a note confirming that I had been signed up for a Philosophy course I've been dying to do.

I headed to the airport in the morning to pick up my dad and uncle who flew down just to celebrate with me. How lucky am I? After stopping at the shop for supplies we came home and had a massive chicken salad for lunch. Everyone else napped while I readied the house for the celebration. When I was done I sat on the couch and, for the first time that day, I let myself think about my mom. I thought about how she must have felt on this day 31 years ago when she gave birth to me. She was 18 years old. I thought about the special bond that grew between us over the years. I thought about the awesome birthday parties she threw for me over the years...especially my 14th, my 16th and of course my 21st. I thought about how I felt the day she was taken away from me. This was my second birthday without her.

Then I wiped away my tears, took a deep breath and resolved to think only happy thoughts for the rest of the day.

The theme of the party was, eh, 'People of Walmart'...haha! So I made chili dogs the way my mom and gran used to (even using the proper Texas Willie Chili powder my Pa had sent over from North Carolina for us), and gave my friends a real taste of the USA!

And boy did we party.
My Daddy-O and me...don't we look just a bit 'Jerry Springer'?!

My biatches
We partied the night away until 2am - the first time I've done that in a very, very long time! It was awesome. We danced and talked rubbish and let go completely. At one stage the girls got into a circle on the 'dance floor' (aka my lounge floor) and sang Wilson Phillips' "Hold On" as loud as we could at the tops of our voices...it was great!

A lot has changed in my life over the past year and it took reflecting back on my birthday a year ago and remembering how I felt and where I was mentally and emotionally for me to realise how far I've come. I'm in a better place now.

I'm finally starting to feel happy and 'whole' again.